This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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