Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
ugly people sure do ruin things
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
