Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
