on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
