We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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