Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
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