booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
