I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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