I wish I could punch you in the face.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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