I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
