sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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