Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
