You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
