Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
