We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize