My brain says no but my pants say off.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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