remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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