You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I cut my penus on the lid.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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