I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
