I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
