idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
