Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
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I just googled if crying burns calories
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
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I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.