friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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