we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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