actually, I'm a sock model
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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