This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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