I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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