Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
