I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
