What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.