I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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