The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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