Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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