by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
