Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Farmville is her only friend.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
