Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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