I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
