gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
