This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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