i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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