What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."