I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
