ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
