what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
