Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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