Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
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