i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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