Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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