I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
