Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
