So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
